Sunday, June 15, 2008

10 Mixed Movie Mash-ups: Seven Brides for Twelve Angry Men

Imagine a guy with a really warped sense of humor and way too much time on his hands (probably me)sitting at his computer in a basement somewhere and an idea strikes him like a surprize defibrilation from behind ("Clear!" BZZT!).

"What's the latest craze in pop music and at the clubs these days?" he asks himself.

"Mash-ups." he answers.

You know, when the DJ mixes two songs together to make something that sounds completely new. Sometimes the songs that are, as they say: "Mashed-up" (or "Mash-up-ed"?) are songs that already sound the same (like Ke$ha's "Tik tok" and Katy Perry's "California Gurls"), sometimes the songs are from different worlds (I heard a Mash-up of Christina Aguilera's "Genie in a bottle" and Sonic Youth's "Dirty Boots", it was surprizingly good).

"But why hasn't this same idea caught on in the movie biz?" crazy basement guy continues, "I mean, they re-make movies all the time, why not mix a couple plot's together while you're at it?"

If I really had a lot of time on my hands I'd go get some footage from these movies and mix them together to make trailers for these movie mash-ups.

Here's the next best thing; I'll write about the movie mash-ups, and you can imagine the announcer voice from the trailers reading these to you out loud.

10 Movie Mash-ups:
  1. The story of a family of share-croppers set in the 1930s. Forced to leave their home by the conditions of the great depression they accidentally arrive on the planet Seti Alpha 6 where they become pawns in Khan’s plans to exact revenge on Captain James T. Kirk of the starship Enterprise. The Grapes of Wrath of Khan.
  2. The story of a southern family in crisis, focuses on the turbulent marriage of Maggie and Brick Pollitt as their daughters get married one by one to successively less and less orthodox Jewish men. Fiddler on a Hot Tin Roof.
  3. After the death of one of America's top primates, one reporter tries to piece together the events that lead from Kong's simple beginnings on a secluded island to the giant-gorilla-billionaire-newspaper-tycoon’s fall from the top of the Empire state building. Citizen Kong.
  4. After an apparently open and shut murder trial, eleven jurors vote guilty, but one man who stands for truth and justice dissents and convinces the rest of the jurors to kidnap seven women and coerce them into marriage. Seven Brides for Twelve Angry Men.
  5. Stanley Orwell’s Dystopian classic, An autocratic government that rules a third of the earth faces destruction as the computer that controls everything, “HAL”, attempts to flush everyone into space. 1984: A Space Odyssey.
  6. With their father away fighting in the Civil War, Joe, Meg, Beth and Amy grow up with their mother who teaches them the ways of the Wu Dan; trouble arises when they steal the green destiny sword. Little Women, Hidden Dragon.
  7. Set During the civil war and reconstruction eras, Rhett Butler (Nicolas Cage) is forced to steal 50 cars in one night to save Scarlet O’Hara’s family plantation. Gone With the Wind in 60 seconds.
  8. Starring Billy Crystal as Dirty Harry, a hard-boiled police detective who has little regard for the rules, but gets results, and Meg Ryan as “Scorpio”, a sniper who terrorizes the city of San Francisco. When Dirty Harry met Sally.
  9. The night before “Princess Buttercup” (Robyn Wright-Penn) is to be married to prince Humperdink, she is kidnapped by 3 men from a neighboring kingdom, it is then up to Frankenstein (Boris Karloff) to rescue her. The Princess Bride of Frankenstein.
  10. The ultimate disaster movie; the effects of global warming escalate rapidly, unexpectedly plunging the world into a new Ice age, the change happens to coincide with a full scale Alien Invasion!! The Independence Day After Tomorrow.

2 comments:

Michael said...

It was...great. I enjoyed it so much my wife wants me to sign divorce papers.

- Clint Eastwoodyallenalda

Anonymous said...

I don't get it :P I have only seen a couple of those flicks though. If you're a movie buff then check out these sites:

tvshacknet
quicksilverscreencom
videolemoncom